Finally the day has come. Sabbatical has started. Kind of. I still have things to do and had a session this morning. I should be relaxed, but I am struggling to de-stress. I must be anxious about leaving, being off, not working and all of it. It is so weird. I thought I may feel like this but I was thinking, nah, I have grown past that. Yet here I am. Bothered.
I think it is important to take emotional assessments. I don’t want to figure out myself so much as I want to change the things that need to change. The foundational thought structures need to be abolished and replaced. To do that there has to be some brutal honesty in what needs to change. There has to be intimacy with God so I am enabled to change all the more. The mind is powerful. The brain is powerful. God is more powerful. This is going to be a process for sure, but I am confident that God will bring me to the places that I long to be. More whole. More peaceful. More myself as God intended.
Allowing God to speak truths over us and receiving them is hard to do. For me the “but” gets in the way. I need to, I want to, I feel ...
Jesus died for me to be free!!